


That One Ridiculous Exploud Card

by romashka



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Pokemon Battle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2017-09-04
Packaged: 2018-12-23 21:20:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11998182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/romashka/pseuds/romashka
Summary: John has an unconventional idea for confessing his feelings.





	That One Ridiculous Exploud Card

“I evolve Loudred.” John placed a stage two card down on top of his active Pokemon.

“What?” Dave picked the card up and examined it. “Dude, this is Japanese, you can’t use it.”

“This...is the fabled Imakuni’s Exploud!” John smiled enthusiastically. “Look at this, it says we have to have our mouths wide open the whole time it’s in play.”

Dave snorted. Deciding to believe him since he couldn’t read Japanese any more than John could, he said, “Well that’s hells of unconventional. What happens if we don’t?”

“It gets mad.”

“It gets mad. Okay. Which has the square root of fuck all effect on the game, right? Alright, what’s the attack? Is that a blank space to write something?”

“Yes!” John replied, in the manner of a businessman giving a presentation who’s just been asked the exact question he was hoping for. “It says, ‘Write the name of the person you like’. And if you don’t have someone you like you can’t use it.” The phrasing, ‘if you don’t have someone you like’, definitively removed it from the realm of friendship.

Without another word, John got up and fetched a biro. He returned, and carefully wrote a name in the space. “Tadah! Okay, I use ‘write the name of the person you like’ for 50 damage.”

The name was in katakana.

“John?”

“Yeah?”

“What kind of weeb shit is this.”

“I looked it up, I typed your name into a converter and-” John stopped and covered his mouth when he realised what he’d said.

“My name?”

“Well apparently it actually says ‘deebu’ but-”

“I’m the person you like?”

“Um.”

“If you just did this so you could use the attack-”

“I could get 50 damage with less than 5 colorless energy and without involving my emotional life. This isn’t actually a good card, I mean...yes. You are the person I like.”

“Oh.” Dave adjusted his shades. He almost said something to the effect of ‘well of course, who wouldn’t want this’, but that seemed a little flippant. “That clears a few things up,” he said finally. “And you thought this would be the right way to tell me?”

“I got the card online, I thought it would be cool.”

Dave put his hand over John’s. “And you were absolutely fucking right. This is an excellent courtship method.”

John laughed nervously. He could never tell how much sarcasm Dave had injected into his words. “Does...that mean you like me back?”

Dave removed his shades, still a notable occurrence. His red eyes were sincere. “Yeah. For, uh, quite a long time, actually.” He paused. “Can I kiss you? I wanna kiss you real quick.”

“That would be nice.”

Dave leaned over the cards on the floor and kissed him softly.

“Are we dating now?” said John.

“I think so?”

John shuffled around so that he was next to rather than facing him, and laid his head on Dave’s shoulder.

Dave put an arm around him and broke into a smile. “Fuckin’ _deebu_.”

**Author's Note:**

> [This](https://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Imakuni%3F%27s_Exploud_ex_\(T_Promo_24\)) is the card in question - when I found out about it via a tumblr post I immediately saw the fic potential.


End file.
